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Old 10-24-2008, 07:10 PM   #1
h4di (3915)
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Default Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

Ini CUPLIKAN dari SURABAYA DREAMING, maaf kalo nggak ngerti bahasanya males translate, pengarangnya kalo ndak salah BUDHI SANTOSO:

Cerito Khayal: Salesman

Kapanane onok Salesman Vaccum Cleaner teko ndhik omahku.
Ewangku durung sempet ngomong opo-opo moro-moro salesman iku
mau langsung nyebarno tembelek wedhus ndhik karpet.
Jarene ngene ”Wis pokoke buk, lek sampek vaccum cleanerku iki gak
isok nyedot, tak jamin tak emploke sithok-sithok tembeleke wedhus iku.”
Jare ewangku ”Peno kepingin didhulit sambel tha ngemploke ?”.
”Lho opoko masalae ?” salesmane takok.
”Lha peno gak ndhelok tha saiki lampu mati ...”


Cerito Khayal: Rasa Stroberi tah ...?

Pas acara perpisahan arek TK, setiap murid nggowo kado gawe bu gurune.
Sing pertama maju anake pedagang bunga.
Bu gurune ngambung kadone ambek mbedhek, ”Isine kembang yo....”.
”Seratus buat bu guru..” jare anake pedagang bunga.
Sing kedua maju anake wong dhodhol mracang.
Ambek bu gurune kadone dikocok-kocok. Wah iki rodok angel mbedheke,
pikire.
”Isine permen yo...”.
”Pinter bu guru..” jare anake wong dhodhol mracang.
Mari ngono, maju anake wong dhodhol es krim. Pas kadone diangkat,
dhadhak netes. Ambek bu gurune tetesane diincipi.
”Es krime rasa anggur yo...” jare bu gurune kemeruh.
”Salah...” jare areke.
”Rasa stroberi tah...?” bu gurune kemeruh maneh.
”Salah ..” jare areke.
”Wis aku nyerah, rasa opo sih iku” takok bu gurune.
”Isinya anak anjing kok bu guru...”

Cerito Khayal: Ngentutan

Yuk Jah lungo perikso nang dokter.
”Opoko sampeyan ning ?” Jare doktere.
Yuk Jah terus cerito, ”Iki lho dok, wis sak wulan iki aku malih ngentutan.
Sak jam isok ping sepuluh aku ngentut. Cumak untunge, entutku iku
gak mambu ambek gak onok suorone, dhadhi gak onok sing ngerti. Lha
iki pas aku longgo ndhik ngarepe sampeyan ae wis ping telu aku ngentut.
Tapi sampeyan gak ngerti tho, mergo iku mau, entutku gak muni ambek
gak mambu. Cumak aku malih gak enak dhewe, mosok arek wedhok
ngentutan ”.
”Oh, ngono tah.. Lek ngono tebusen resep iki. Seminggu maneh mbaliko
rene maneh” jare doktere.
Pas wis seminggu yuk Jah mbalik maneh nang doktere.
”Wis enakan tah ?” takok doktere.
”Aku gak ngerti obat opo sing dokter kekno wingi, cumak entutku saiki
kokambune malih bosok gak karuan. Sampek kudhu nggeblak aku. Tapi
untunge entutku sik tetep gak muni”, jare yuk Jah.
”Berarti saiki irung sampeyan wis gak buntu maneh. Saiki tebusen resep
ikiyo” jare doktere.
”Obat opo maneh iku pak dokter ?” takok yuk Jah.
”Obat kopok..”

Urip Bebojoan: ”Rp. 200,000”

Sore-sore jam 3 onok tamu teko omahe Cak No.
”Kulo nuwun. Aku Kusen ning. Cacakmu onok tah ?” jare tamune.
”Sik durung mulih.. diluk ngkas paling, pinarak sik cak..” jare bojone
Cak No. Mari ngono arek loro malih asik ngobrol ambek ngenteni Cak No
mulih.
”Sik tah ning, lek tak sawang-sawang sampeyan iku ayu lho athik seksi
pisan” Kusen mulai ngerayu.
”Peno jok macem-macem lho, tak kandakno bojoku tebhal sampeyan”
jare bojone Cak No.
”Ngene lho ning, aku wis gak tahan maneh. Lek aku oleh sun pipi sampeyan
pisan ae, dhuwik satus ewu iki jupuken” jare Kusen ambek ngetokno
seket ewuan loro.
Pikire bojone Cak No, mek disun thok ae, gak bakal konangan, opomaneh
jamane krismon lak lumayan tah.
”Yo wis, tapi diluk ae yo”. jare bojone Cak No.
Mari ngesun, Kusen ngekekno dhuwike.
”Tapi ning, aku sik gak lego lek gak ngesun karo-karone. Lek oleh ngesun
sitoke, tak kei satus ewu maneh” jare Kusen.
Pikire bojone Cak No, yo gak opo-opo se, paling mek diluk koyok mau.
Mari ngesun, Kusen ngetokno satus ewu maneh.
Bojone Cak No sueneng gak karuan, ”Sing iki pisan cak... gae bonus”,
jarene.
Mari ngono Kusen terus pamitan alasane kesuwen ngenteni Cak No gak
teko-teko soale katene arep onok urusan liyo.
Gak sui, Cak No mulih.
”Cak mau onok konco sampeyan teko jenenge Kusen, wonge antik pol..”
bojone cerito.
”Oh iyo pancen mbethik arek iku.. Jarene kate nyaur utang rongatus
ewu, wis dibayar tah?”

*Trims
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Old 10-24-2008, 07:16 PM   #2
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

Dadi eling mulih Suroboyo rek ketemu konco2
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Old 10-24-2008, 07:18 PM   #3
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

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Originally Posted by cakrawalabf View Post
Dadi eling mulih Suroboyo rek ketemu konco2
Sesok mampir mung rong jam ae,
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Old 10-24-2008, 08:14 PM   #4
legability (3139)
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

mbanyolan lawas tapi sek enak ae lek diwoco
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Old 10-24-2008, 08:35 PM   #5
b@yu (1188)
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

hehehe...jadi inget sama tokoh utamanya, si Wonokairun...
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Old 10-24-2008, 08:56 PM   #6
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

nek arep attach jilid 1-3 yak opo yo, file e .pdf 384 kb, kegeden mosok copy paste siji2, wegah
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Old 10-24-2008, 09:16 PM   #7
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

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mbanyolan lawas tapi sek enak ae lek diwoco
Gae nostalgia ae rek, guyonan khas Suroboyoan sampe eling mangan sego bebek Karang Empat karo baksone
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Old 10-24-2008, 09:21 PM   #8
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

Lhe jarene sunter + kelapa gading wes pusat e panganan khas sak ndonyo, yo wes mene ne moleh aku yo di oleh2 hi no, wet lesu maneh, mindo indomie ae koyo arek "kos2an" suegggerrr
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Old 10-24-2008, 09:26 PM   #9
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

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Originally Posted by h4di View Post
Lhe jarene sunter + kelapa gading wes pusat e panganan khas sak ndonyo, yo wes mene ne moleh aku yo di oleh2 hi no, wet lesu maneh, mindo indomie ae koyo arek "kos2an" suegggerrr
Yo wis kapan sampeyan teko lek pas sempet tak gowokno sego bebek khas Suroboyo yo
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Old 10-24-2008, 09:29 PM   #10
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

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Originally Posted by cakrawalabf View Post
Yo wis kapan sampeyan teko lek pas sempet tak gowokno sego bebek khas Suroboyo yo
Eiiki godaan sing angel untuk dilewat no, tur ngerusak jadwal diet, ehm kapan bos siap e, kulo tak nderek mawon
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Old 10-24-2008, 09:45 PM   #11
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

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Eiiki godaan sing angel untuk dilewat no, tur ngerusak jadwal diet, ehm kapan bos siap e, kulo tak nderek mawon
Hehehe, nanti sy atur ya
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Old 10-24-2008, 09:46 PM   #12
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

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Hehehe, nanti sy atur ya
Yo siaapp, ngenteni undangan ne
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Old 10-24-2008, 09:48 PM   #13
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Yo siaapp, ngenteni undangan ne
Beres pak, tapi ojo Senen besok yo baru mulih teko Pekanbaru sik repot kabeh
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Old 10-24-2008, 09:53 PM   #14
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Default Re: Suroboyoan (Surabaya Dreaming)

sego bebek e iso dikirim nyang semarang ora? hehehe
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Old 10-24-2008, 09:56 PM   #15
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sego bebek e iso dikirim nyang semarang ora? hehehe
Walah cik adoh men, kapan teko Jakarta tak ajak mangan sego bebek karang empat cab Pluit numpak "Harley" ku
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