Unbelievable Statements by Lawyers

rudinugraha · 02-27-2007, 10:04 AM

These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts of America, and are things attorneys actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters, who had to suffer from the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.
______________________________ ______________________________ _________

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't now about it until the next morning?

WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?

______________________________ ______________________________ _________

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?

WITNESS: Yes.

ATTORNEY: How many were boys?

WITNESS: None.

ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?

______________________________ ______________________________ __________

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?

WITNESS: By death.

ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?

______________________________ ______________________________ __________

ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?

WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard.

ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?

______________________________ ______________________________ ___________

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?

WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.

ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?

WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him.

_______________________________ ______________________________ ___________

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?

WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law!

______________________________ ______________________________ ____________

andhara · 02-27-2007, 03:29 PM

Ah..yang mboten-mboten aja nih...

b@yu · 02-27-2007, 03:56 PM

kekekekeke....lucu jg nih....

02-27-2007, 10:04 AM	#1
rudinugraha (1532) NAC 033 Join Date: Aug 2005 Location: Jakarta Posts: 1,194	Unbelievable Statements by Lawyers These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts of America, and are things attorneys actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters, who had to suffer from the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place. ______________________________ ______________________________ _________ ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't now about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ______________________________ ______________________________ _________ ATTORNEY: She had three children, right? WITNESS: Yes. ATTORNEY: How many were boys? WITNESS: None. ATTORNEY: Were there any girls? ______________________________ ______________________________ __________ ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated? WITNESS: By death. ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated? ______________________________ ______________________________ __________ ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual? WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beard. ATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female? ______________________________ ______________________________ ___________ ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body? WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m. ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time? WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him. _______________________________ ______________________________ ___________ ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy? WITNESS: No. ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor? WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar. ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless? WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law! ______________________________ ______________________________ ____________

02-27-2007, 03:29 PM	#2
andhara (10200) NAC MEMBER Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: My Mother Earth, Jakarta Posts: 9,518	Re: Unbelievable Statements by Lawyers Ah..yang mboten-mboten aja nih...

02-27-2007, 03:56 PM	#3
b@yu (1188) NAC MEMBER Join Date: May 2006 Location: Jakarta Posts: 624	Re: Unbelievable Statements by Lawyers kekekekeke....lucu jg nih....

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